Chango • Live Set

Chango performs a Live Set on Dan Victor Does. Pure Energy, Electronic Music, Mexican, Producer, Rapper… Luchador. Watch Chango on Episode 3 of the next DVD Concerts.

Dan Victor DoesArt + Music + Mental Health: Performances, Interviews and Commentary on how creatives achieve mental well-being through their craft. Support the podcast.

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Sacrifice + Abandon

“Sacrifice & Abandon” 🎨 by Dan Victor. 12 x 9” #Watercolor#Graphiteon paper. It began with a photo in the newspaper of an old man…

I had been living at my mother’s house after moving back from San Diego in 2002. I had just turned 25 & moved there to get away from drinking too much. I thought it was seasonal depression, so I needed to go somewhere sunny all the time.

I realized once I was in Cali, I had something wrong with me. I was away from my support network and getting drunk every day with the band. Depression and anxiety had hit an all time high. Why???

I was unable to financially or physically take care of myself, so my stepfather came out and drove me back to NJ. #forevergrateful I had to live with them while I sought mental help. 

Not able to work, I started painting again. And watching a shitload of rentals from Blockbuster. I had the unlimited plan, but could take out only 3 at a time. I would watch all 3, drive back, rent another 3 in hopes of finishing them to rent a total of 9 movies in one day… it happened a couple times.

Even though I was catatonic, completely sober & on heavy meds, I could paint.

It wasn’t until I was 30 that I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder by a good psychiatrist that immediately put me on the right meds, after trying many of both.

I saw a newspaper in my local paper of an old man, looking for subject matter to paint. I saw this guy in a band piercing out this window. I connected the 2. 

The old man was sad and doing something reluctantly which he new would cause harm, but a ‘lesser of evils’. He was leaving his adult son, but the question remains… why?

My father was absent a lot of the time, but my grandfather filled the void. 

Pop-pop. A kind man. So good to us, but always had a similar look on his face. I wondered what he had done to feel the way his face spoke.

The son behind the glass what’s to understand why. It was the question I was asking myself. How can I reconcile those you look to offer passive neglect or absolute control? 

This painting attempts to communicate the regret we may feel for something we know will cause harm. And still… not looking back.

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Painting of Ben Eating

“Nephew Ben Eats A Pretzel” 🎨 by Dan Victor. ✍🏼 36 x 24″ – Ink, graphite, watercolor on paper. There is a wild story behind this one. I was in the ER with a broken hand the night before Christmas eve…⁣⠀

This is Ben and he is so much like me it is scary. Creative child and very talented. I wanted to spark imagination, so I drew a perspective of Ben in black and white, to contrast with the colorful background of creatures you might find in “Where the Wild Things Are”.⁣⠀

Detail 1

I wanted to do something special for my brother @jasonvictor and his family. He is always taking pictures of his boys so I thought an ambitious piece a week before Christmas was a good idea. That’s up for debate.⁣⠀

The real world is juxtaposed upon the imaginary. I was very inspired by the Piers Anthony ‘Adept’ series. #Juxtapose was the first book, I think. About a world of science on top of a world of magic, taking up the same space. Great book. This painting is to show what is possible.⁣

Detail 2

I am happy about how it turned out now, but at the time I was #underthegun to get it done. I had to leave for my parents house in #NewJersey the next day and it wasn’t done to my standards & put a lot of pressure on myself. Wouldn’t you do the same? Come on, right?⁣⠀

I suddenly realized I had gone to dark with my cross-hatching because I was working on the floor. I so got frustrated. I thought I ruined it. Threw water on it to pull it up with a paper towel. Got frantic and I punched the floor. Oh crap, what did I just do?⁣⠀

Detail 3

So when I arrived to NJ with the painting, my hand had swollen up to grapefruit size and my knuckle had been pushed back in what is known as a boxing fracture.⁣⠀

When Christmas morning came and my nephew tore the wrapping paper off the frame, I thought… I broke my hand for my art. Who can say that?⁣⠀

Detail 4

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